Hard work does not equal success—and it’s time we admit it. As high-achieving women, we push ourselves to the limit. We believe that hard work is the key to achieving our goals. But what if hard work is actually ruining your success at this point?
In a recent conversation with Dr. Shamieka Dean, a renowned mentor and business strategist, we explored a revolutionary concept: rest as the new revenue. Dr. Dean’s approach is about realigning with our true selves to create success that doesn’t come at the cost of our well-being.
We’re challenging the traditional narrative that high-achieving women must sacrifice their sanity, health, and relationships to reach the top.
Instead, she advocates for a paradigm shift. Success is built on a foundation of alignment and purpose rather than endless hard work. As she explains, many of us have developed a high tolerance for pain. We equate pain with progress. But this mindset only leads to burnout and frustration.
Dr. Dean reveals how embracing rest and staying true to your core identity leads to success without the burnout. She also shares what steps you can take to replace the grind that’s making you miserable. This conversation is essential for any high-achieving woman who is feeling burnt out (or on the verge of it) and is ready to see how rest can reignite your success.
While this conversation is not directly about copywriting, it’s the prerequisite to be able to produce the amount and the quality of copywriting that needs to happen. This conversation is for the ones who are ready to do the deep work that is necessary to move forward with foundation underneath your feet.
Rest outperforms hustle when it comes to long-term success, and I’m going to let Dr. Dean tell you why. Let’s dive in.
Rest Is The New Revenue For High-Achieving Women
For high-achieving women, the hustle that once fueled our early successes can start to feel exhausting. We’ve reached a point where we simply don’t have the energy to push through in the same way we did in our 20s or 30s. The way we approach success needs to evolve. This is where Dr. Dean’s unique methodology comes into play: rest is the new revenue.
When most people hear “rest,” the first thing they think is to stop, stall, take time off, and do nothing. But rest is really about alignment first. That alignment is about who you are, who you’re called to serve, and how you serve them. It’s a shift from the constant hustle to a more thoughtful, intentional way of working.
It’s not that hard work is the only way. We have created such a high tolerance level for pain that we subconsciously reject anything that doesn’t require pain for us to get results. That’s why many people are addicted to hard work.
It gives you a dopamine hit. It makes you feel like you deserve this because you have worked so hard for it. However, when everything that you created up until this point is birthed from a place of pain, you continue to self-inflict pain to get more results. But you don’t have to!
Dr. Dean’s perspective is a refreshing reminder that high-achieving women need to hear: we can rewrite that narrative. By embracing rest as a tool for aligning with our true selves, we can thrive without the grind. We don’t need to prove our worth through endless hard work.
The High Cost of Hustle For High-Achieving Women
Dr. Dean is shedding light on the realities of being over busy and always working, especially for us high-achieving women. She shared that those who came before us—our parents, grandparents, and beyond—worked harder because they had no other choice. They didn’t have the resources, tools, or opportunities that we have today. But here’s the kicker: we rarely stop to consider what that hustle truly cost them.
We see the results they achieved, but we overlook the sacrifices they made to get there. Dr. Dean challenges us to ask, was this really the only way to succeed? Or was it just the only way they knew?
Think about it. If your parents had to work two or three jobs, it wasn’t because hard work was the only path to success. It was because they needed to make ends meet. They did what they had to do to provide a better life for their families. But at what cost?
If you’re doing this for your family, it shouldn’t cost you your family to achieve it.
We don’t remember our parents for how hard they worked. We remember them for the moments they were there when it mattered most.
How many birthdays did they miss?
How many family vacations?
How many dinners?
How many important moments slipped by because they were working so hard to build a future?
Success doesn’t have to come at the expense of our sanity, our relationships, or our health. It’s not about choosing between hard work and success. It’s about redefining success so that it doesn’t harm us or the people we love in the process.
She puts it so powerfully: If you’re doing this for your family, it shouldn’t cost you your family to achieve it.
Sit with that for a moment.
What is driving your ambition?
Dr. Dean encourages us to shift our perspective. To build success in a way that aligns with our values and preserves what matters most to us. It’s a message that high-achieving women need to hear: We can have it all, but we don’t have to sacrifice it all to get there.
Quick: when was the last time you got a new client from your email list? Want more of that? Join the Copy Critique Club for expert, personalized feedback from a copywriter with a track record of sold-out launches. Get the clients you need for 2024 with copy that works.
True Wealth Comes From Embracing Your Core Identity As High-Achieving Women
Dr. Dean has such a powerful way of getting to the heart of what it means to be truly wealthy, especially for high-achieving women like us. We’ve all done the personal development work, are deep in our spirituality, and have tried to balance the demands of business and family. But let’s be real—how many of us are actually living in alignment with what we’ve learned? How often do we find ourselves slipping back into old habits, struggling to maintain boundaries, and feeling trapped by the very success we’ve worked so hard to achieve?
Dr. Dean poses a question that hits home: What is the true wealth of your “why”? She encourages us to dig deep and really examine the depth, width, and height of why we do what we do. For many of us, the inability to pull back and create balance stems from a fear of losing something—or someone. And sometimes, that “someone” is the version of ourselves that we’ve crafted to achieve this level of success.
When your identity becomes intertwined with your income and influence, stepping back can feel like losing a part of who you are.
We’re known as the seven-figure earners, the driven, ambitious women who make things happen. But who knows you at your core? Are you solid enough within yourself to restructure how you’re building your life and business, to achieve the same results without feeling like you’re losing a piece of yourself?
Dr. Dean calls this “performance identity”—where we find validation in our accomplishments, in the applause, the accolades, the recognition. It’s why we panic at the thought of pulling back. We’re so used to the praise, the admiration, the awards that tell us we’re doing a good job. That is how we begin to equate our worth with our work.
But here’s the truth: Your worth isn’t tied to your achievements. It’s not about the roles you play, the rewards you receive, or how much money you make. It’s about establishing your core identity. Being so solid within yourself that you know that you are enough. You’ve always been enough, and you always will be. Whether people clap for you or not. Whether they recognize your greatness or not.
And that is a different kind of peace. It’s the peace that allows you to pivot when you need to. Without fear, without doubt, and without being imprisoned by others’ opinions. It’s the peace that comes from embracing your true identity and understanding that true wealth isn’t just about financial success. It’s about being grounded in who you are, no matter what.
Curious what rest looks like for me as a business owner and mom of littles? I’m sharing how I personally redefine rest when it feels like work and life is overwhelming. Check out my interview on the Tick Talk: Make Time For What Matters with Kali Brigham. It’s on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and YouTube.
Moving from Performance to Purpose By Embracing Your Core Identity As High-Achieving Women
When you look at a high-achieving woman, you can quickly tell if she is operating from a performance identity versus her core identity.
When a woman is moving from her performance identity, she’s often:
- Unable to take a step back, even if she has a top-tier team capable of delivering results.
- Feels the need to keep her laptop near, just in case there’s a fire that only she can put out.
- Her relationships tend to be transactional or closely tied to her business network.
- When it’s time to make a shift, her first thoughts are about money, what others will think, or the time she’s already invested.
That’s performance identity in action.
On the other hand, a woman operating from her core identity approaches life differently.
- She can release things that no longer serve her without questioning her worth or value.
- Her thoughts center on peace, sanity, and how she’ll feel about herself when she looks in the mirror at night.
- She’s not driven by external validation but by an inner alignment with her purpose and authenticity.
- No matter how much money she is making, she remains solid in who she is—unwavering, unshaken, and unbothered by the opinions of others.
How To Align With Your Core Identity
The process of aligning with your core identity is about surrendering. We grow at the pace we’re prepared to grow, and that preparation is rooted in the woman you are within. Dr. Dean calls this process “soul level success”—building from a place of wholeness, not neediness, from value, not a void.
The challenge many face is that surface-level success is easier. It doesn’t require us to look deeply at ourselves. To peel back the layers and masks we’ve put on to protect ourselves from rejection or abandonment. But establishing your core identity is about asking yourself the tough questions: Who would I be if I didn’t fear judgment? How would I dress, speak, or express myself? Who was I before the world told me who I couldn’t be?
The essence of core identity is returning to the person you were before life’s pressures and expectations began to shape you into someone else.
Dr. Dean reminds us that even as children, we know who we are at our core. And this is why you will find a child who picks up a pencil and they start drumming on things when they don’t even know what music is. Or no matter how many times you tell them not that the wall is not paper, you see their gift as an artist.
It’s our God-given design. But over time, we may lose touch with that identity, taking the path of least resistance to avoid trouble or discomfort.
Your core identity is about how deep you’re willing to go and how quickly you’re willing to embrace that depth. It’s about surrendering to who you truly are and building a life that reflects that authenticity, without fear, without hesitation, and without the need for anyone else’s approval.
Looking to go deeper on this topic? Check out this powerful article: Hone Your Authentic Brand Voice To Build Trust And Credibility.
Surrender Is Your Supernatural Success Strategy
When Dr. Dean talks about surrender, especially for high-achieving women who are also moms and business owners, it’s not about stopping or giving up. Instead, surrender is about releasing the need to control every outcome.
Dr. Dean explains that the urge to control is often rooted in a desire to avoid hardship or discomfort. But when you let go of this need, you begin to operate from a place of alignment with your true self—your core identity.
As high-achieving women, we often feel the pressure to prove ourselves. Whether it’s through our business successes or the way we manage our homes. Dr. Dean encourages us to shift this mindset. Imagine posting on social media not to get validation or approval but because what you’re sharing is already valuable to you. When you detach from the need for external validation, you move from a place of performance identity to one of core identity. This shift allows you to create and give from a place of abundance and self-assuredness, rather than from a need to prove your worth.
Dr. Dean’s perspective on surrender also extends into personal relationships, like marriage. She shares that surrender means showing up as a whole version of yourself, not looking for your partner to fill a void or define your identity. Instead, you bring value into the relationship because you already know your worth. This approach is transformative, allowing you to navigate life and relationships with a deep sense of peace and purpose.
The Essence of Surrender
The essence of surrender, as Dr. Dean describes it, is trusting in a higher path that’s already been laid out for you. It’s not about figuring out how to achieve success or wealth, but understanding that you were born into it. When you walk into any room, you do so with the confidence that you already embody the success you’re seeking. This shift from striving to simply being is what truly sets you apart and allows you to operate from a place of peace and authenticity.
For high-achieving women, this approach might feel counterintuitive at first. After all, we’ve been conditioned to believe that hard work and control are the keys to success. But Dr. Dean challenges us to consider that true wealth and success come not from what we do, but from who we are. When you align with your core identity, everything else—money, peace, success—flows naturally. You’re not doing it to prove anything; you’re doing it because it’s simply who you are.
Peace and success are not about doing more, but about being more
That means being more aligned, more authentic, more at peace with who we are. And when you operate from this place, the world around you begins to respond in kind. You exude confidence, peace, and a sense of purpose that others can’t help but notice. This is the true power of surrender for high-achieving women.
If you are looking for a copywriter who can hold space for this level of depth and support you in expressing this identity-level work, get started with a Power Hour. We can take what you have already created, or word vomit your thoughts, and walk away with powerful copy that will seriously drive the results you’re after. Whether you’re looking for a sales page, website, social strategy, or SEO-optimized blog process…you get my brain on your business for one solid hour. The ROI of these have been quick and profound—like this case study! Book your Power Hour today.
Connect with Dr. Shamieka Dean
Dr. Shamieka Dean is a pioneering mentor and catalyst for transformational personal and professional growth. As an executive coach, business strategist and spiritual advisor to leaders worldwide, she has helped countless individuals catalyze exponential positive change across all dimensions of a person’s life – from marriage, ministry, motherhood, and making more money. She has a gift for seeing innate untapped genius in people and guiding them into alignment with their God-designed destiny.
Dr. Dean is most known for challenging paradigms of hustle and hard work by revolutionizing how women view success. As a #1 best-selling author, award-winning business owner and leader, Dr. Dean guides over 100,000 individuals towards holistic, balanced success. Her achievements have been featured on major platforms like Steve Harvey, TedX, Thinkific, TubeBuddy and Zapier.
Connect with Dr. Shamieka Dean on Facebook by clicking here. Visit her website at shamiekadean.com.
